Chapter II: March
March 8th, 2018: I remember waking up excited about the meaning of this day. It was exactly 6 months to our wedding date and I remember shamelessly posting a countdown picture out of excitement. At this point, his anger had died down a bit. I figured some time apart while I was on this work trip in Seattle would help. Unfortunately, I was traveling with many male coworkers/friends for a conference, which didn’t help ease his nerves. But I knew as soon as he saw everyone at his birthday party, it would all be wonderful again and he would know everything was for him.
We had texted during the trip. Everything seemed more normal. I don’t know exactly what time he did what he did, but we chatted on the phone before bed, said our I love yous and goodnights as we did any other night I was on a work trip.
March 16th:
The plan was in action! It was the Friday before his birthday and I told my fiance that we had dinner plans the next day for his St. Patrick’s Day Birthday. “Perfect,” he said. His friends were coming in from the suburbs to take him out for drinks after work.
“Exxxxxcellent,” I thought.
I remember letting his friend into the apartment that afternoon to talk logistics as I frantically threw the food I had spent all day making in random drawers since he decided last minute to stop at home before going out. The plan worked, thankfully, and his friend and him later left the apartment (I was hiding) giving me a few more hours to gather everyone and finish preparing the food, drinks and decorations.
Everyone slowly gathered. My friends, his friends, even his friends from out of state! I had told my partner in crime about his jealousy incident and they even said to invite any male friend in question to prove there was nothing to worry about. I agreed.
After much coercing, we were able to get him back to the apartment earlier than he would have expected. My poor neighbor called him to tell him there was a small fire in the building and that he had to come home to check on our unit. To think I actually felt really bad
SURPRISE!!
At first, I thought he was tearing up; perhaps realizing he had been too hard on me or perhaps realizing how much we all loved him. I went to give him a hug and he barely took notice. I took it for shock at the time but the more I look back on it, I’m not sure what it really was. My parents were there. They loved him. My mom later told me she had taken him aside and told him he never had to worry about me and that I loved him. She said she thought it resonated but what he said to her was odd.
“I wish you had told me that earlier.”